CH.5 Night Blossoms

Ch.5 Night Blossoms

I grabbed my favorite grey cloak and rushed to follow Adrian to the garden. I wasn't sure why I was so eager to talk to him, but lately I had found myself savoring every moment that I spent with him. I suppose he was still a stranger to me, but I had felt like I had known him all my life. Once outside, he guided me to my favorite spot under the bare cherry blossom tree. The frigid winter air made me feel alive and awake and I sat there for a moment, enjoying the feeling of it on my skin. I thought of how far away last summer, the summer that everything changed, felt. I wouldn’t change anything ever, not for the world. Dilan had since left with his parents, Adrian staying due to my mother’s push. Max would be leaving soon to be married. Snow flurries began dusting the ground and I leaned my face back to enjoy the sensation of ice on my skin. I stole a look over at Adrian, who was doing the same, looking blissfully happy. I began to laugh.

“Winter is so beautiful isn’t it?” He said, continuing to lean toward the sky.

“Most people think I’m utterly insane when I tell them it’s my favorite season.”

“I don’t blame them; you are a lot to handle.” He said, winking.

I playfully shoved him, losing my balance in the process. He caught and steadied my weight against his, our noses inches apart.  We stayed that way, lost in each other’s thoughts, our breath fogging around us.

“Hello.”He breathed, a glimmer of a smile playing on his lips. 

I quickly moved back to where I was sitting, my face burning. 

“Sorry…” I whispered.

“No need to apologize…” He said, still staring.

“Is there something wrong?”

“Oh…no…nothing…” He blushed, making me laugh.

“My hands are freezing; I wish I had brought my gloves.” He clasped his hands around mine, in an attempt to warm them.

“Your hands are so small…” He said, absentmindedly running his finger over the scar on my palm.

“Your hands are so large…” I grinned up at him, the moonlight causing his eyes to become bright and beautiful.

“Your eyes haven’t changed yet; it will only be a matter of time…” Adrian was studying my face now, as if trying to take a mental picture to save forever.

I continued to stare up at him, taking in all of his features. His lips perfectly pink against smooth light olive skin, his hair such a dark contrast to his light eyes. He was simply…

“Incredible…”

“What?” his lips formed a teasing smile, as if pressing me for the context of my thoughts, though I knew he could already hear them.

“What’s the point of even having thoughts around you if you just listen to them?” I was teasing of course, but there was some truth to the statement.

He seemed taken aback by my words, his face looking slightly shocked, then grinned mischievously.

“It’s more of a burden than you might think. It takes lots of practice to tune in to the ones you want to listen to, all the while trying to listen to your own thoughts.” He continued to clasp my hands in his own, something that I surprisingly enjoyed.

“What are your own thoughts saying?”  I was genuinely curious; otherwise I would have stayed silent.

He cupped my hands in his face, staring into my eyes before gingerly planting a kiss on my unsuspecting lips.

I knew what was coming before it happened. My vision tunneled for the second time that night and I prepared myself for the next memory, eager to learn a piece of my past.

When my vision cleared I was standing on an all too familiar spot on the beach. This time I was 15 and it was dark. It was a stunning night, clear with all stars glowing brightly, the moon full and the waters sparkling. As I watched, a boy came into view, the scent of night blossoms drifting towards me. The eyes were hard to miss glinting in the moonlight, as if he had been born with stars instead.

“A little late for a trip to the water isn’t it?” Adrian said, never taking his eyes off me.

Meanwhile I continued to thoughtfully watch the tide roll and retreat back into the dark sea.

“I couldn’t sleep.” The wind rustled my hair ever so slightly.

“Neither could I.”

“Do you ever get sick of it?” I turned to face him.

“Of what? Life? No.” He was watching the sea now, as if considering jumping in and drifting away.

“But it’s a great deal more difficult for you than me…How do you do it?”

“Well. If I smiled more I would say that the trick is to grin and bear it but…judging from what people seem to observe I guess I don’t do that much.” He smiled to himself, which just as it did in present times, caused my younger self to smile as well.

Adrian took my hand and traced the scar just as he had done previously.

The memory was beginning to confuse me. None of it made sense. Why was it Adrian comforting me, not Dilan?

And then it happened. He took my younger self’s head in his hands and planted the same kiss on my lips. Suddenly I understood, partly at least.

The memory began to fade away and I was back in the present.

“It was you…never Dilan…All those memories I have they were with you…”

Relief flooded his face, his eyes glinting with joy. It was as if my revelation seemingly absolved some of the burden that he always carried. 

“You remember.”

“Why did you do that to me…Why did you replace all those memories with ones of Dilan. I didn’t love him at all…”

Why would he hurt himself like that…

“I had to leave you. Soon after that. I didn’t want you being in danger or unhappy because I couldn’t be there to protect you. You had Max, but even he knew that this would be best for your family.  I couldn’t have anybody knowing that we were jointly connected, so I had to sever the connection. Dilan, who has always loved you, was the perfect candidate for replacing your memories because at least then it as someone nearby who cared about you. It hurt me so badly to see you that way, but I didn’t have a choice. I would rather you be safe and not remember me than dead unable to be here at all.”

All I could do was hug him. I breathed in his scent, one so familiar now it hurt to think of it missing. His fingers stroked my hair, running through the thick tresses.

“You’re back…” He squeezed me tighter, as if I might slip away if he released his grip. I didn’t mind, it had been years since I had really talked to him, much less touched him. My lips met his and it was if my heart had been unlocked. He was my person and I finally had him back.